Month: August 2013

Saturday 31.08. 2013  PAF

Pavlos advises me to go back to the Studio and Rehearse.

• what kind of dance Fenia dances?
• How do you correct yourself while you are doing something without using the camera?
• Improvisation/score/repetition/rehearse/set up?
• More optimistic  point of view.
• A real dance piece. A real theater piece

His words resonate inside me. It’s like to hear an inner voice coming out and saying > Leave this computer, leave the camera, leave the thoughts, the books and the reflections and bring my body back to the space, to the studio. This is a real confrontation with myself. I realize more clearly that the use of the camera and the editing sometimes become an excuse in order to hide myself from this challenge. I keep longing for an embodiment of the theory, for dancing again with pleasure and curiosity. By doing you understand, Pavlos says and I know that he is right or at least that this way function for myself. Also when I write and speak I feel that thoughts and ideas becoming more concrete,  more real.

So why am I so afraid to go back to the Studio and deal with the first moment of frustration> What am I supposed to do?

I think I was need someone else to encourage me to do that. As it happened. Time to do it.

~He advised me to watch  Ritsema- Borrows piece> Weak dance-strong questions

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djz2dWO6r-4

…………………………….

I started by watching the raccomended  video and writing some reflections about it. Then I started warming up my body with massage and different somatic techniques based in improvisation and movement exploration. After a while I started moving into the space while my music list was playing randomly some songs.

I was warmed up enough to start making some scores I had thought and written before entering in the studio.

1. dancing and speaking about what I am doing and feeling on the moment.Trying to keep the flow of the movement and the voice at the same time.
2. dancing and speaking about what “dance” is for me.
3. dance and narrating some memories from the past.
4. dance in silence.

In a certain moment I remembered when I used dancing as child in the entrance of the building with my little chair while my audience (the passengers) were crossing the street (they could see me because the main door was made with glass). I used to listen or Michael Jackson or Greek singers of 80’s like my favorite> Pwlina:

• Voice experimentation>

The fact that voice is one of my weakest points I decided to use it and sing my old times  favorite song>

“Pame gia treles stis Seiheles” of Pwlina (Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie

Lyrics in Greek

Λα, λα, λα …

Δε με ριγούν τα μεγάλα τα ψάρια
κι οι καρχαρίες και τ’ αρσενικά
είμαι απ’ αυτές που κερδίζουν στα ζάρια
η συνταγή φυσικά είναι μια

Ποια ; Ποια ; Ποια ;
Τι σημαίνουν όλα αυτά ;

Με ένα σούπερ τοσοδούλι μίνι διάφανο και ροζ μπικίνι
κάνω ντου και τρομάζει ο ντουνιάς
με το βρεγμένο σούπερ μίνι διάφανο και ροζ μπικίνι
πέφτουν όλοι ξεροί μονομιάς

Λα, λα, λα …

Κι όμως θυμάμαι παλιά καλοκαίρια, λα λα λα
πόσο ντρεπόμουν τις πλαζ γενικά, λα λα λα
γυαλιά φορούσα μπουρνούζια καπέλα, λα λα λα
μα τα ξεπέρασα πια όλα αυτά

Ποια ; Ποια ; Ποια ;
Πώς ξεπέρασε όλα αυτά ;

Με ένα σούπερ τοσοδούλι μίνι διάφανο και ροζ μπικίνι
κάνω ντου και τρομάζει ο ντουνιάς
με το βρεγμένο σούπερ μίνι διάφανο και ροζ μπικίνι
πέφτουν όλοι ξεροί μονομιάς

Mπα μπα μπα δεν κρατιέται αυτή παιδιά

Λα, λα, λα …

Πήρα μαθήματα ανατομίας, λα λα λα
είδα δεκάδες διαφημιστικά, λα λα λα
Έφτιαξα όλας τας αδυναμίας, λα λα λα
δε με κομπλάρουν τα ξένα κορμιά

Ποια ; Ποια ; Ποια ;
Τι σημαίνουν όλα αυτά ;

Με ένα σούπερ τοσοδούλι μίνι διάφανο και ροζ μπικίνι
κάνω ντου και τρομάζει ο ντουνιάς
με το βρεγμένο σούπερ μίνι διάφανο και ροζ μπικίνι
πέφτουν όλοι ξεροί μονομιάς

Μπα μπα μπα δεν κρατιέται αυτή παιδιά

Με ένα σούπερ τοσοδούλι μίνι διάφανο και ροζ μπικίνι
κάνω ντου και τρομάζει ο ντουνιάς
με το βρεγμένο σούπερ μίνι διάφανο και ροζ μπικίνι
πέφτουν όλοι ξεροί μονομιάς

Μα ποια είσαι τέλος πάντων ;
-ένα καρακατσουλιό
Στόχος έγινες των πάντων
ε, με τον τρόπο μου κι εγώ

Of course after while people from the next room started to complain..I cannot understand why they could enjoy my marvelous voice  repeating 100 times the refrain of the song!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway different thing came out from 4 hours non stop dance and voice practice in relation to memories.

How can I present this material as very “important”element in the auto ethnological museum of Fenia? How teh audinece will interact and experience the sharing of Fenia’s memories?

…………..

In the evening we watched all together the lecture that pavlos proposed “The many headed monster” by Joshua Sofaer regarding  contemporary performance practices and their relationships with audiences.

Very interesting questions, sharing of opinions and thoughts regarding the audience, its importance, the various ways to deal with based on the needs of the individual project etc.

What kind of relationship I want to built up my audience?

How much interactive or participatory I want the project to be?

How the audience can be involved to the process of deconstruction and construction of someone’s else Identity?

Tomorrow during the experimentation I could try out some options.

Very interesting inspiration is the work of Oreet Ashery: Say cheese, 2002> In one to one performance that took place in a bedroom, she was performing as a religious Jewish drag king in order to make the participant to speak about things that in another context probably wouldn’t dare. In a certain point the participant would decide to take  a picture of the situation. This foto would be sent to him the day after as  a”memory”/trace of the performance/possibility for post reflection of the experience. The participant, also, becomes an artist(photographer) by taking decision within the performance.

www.7atcsoflove.org

Friday 30. 08.2013   PAF

Today I wake up half hour later and with a red eye. It seems that the project works good at least regarding the dis-composition of my left side (associated with the female energy for some people). This fit with the deconstruction of identity. I won’t be surprised if one day I wake up with a real mustache…but only on the right side

The tasks of today are:

1. Write the other 23 letters of Fenias Dictionary.
2. Make a research about MAI.
3. Start writing  a scenario about the female and male encounter. About what they are going to speak? How they meet?
4. Make the video “man in the mirror” based to the yesterday performance, which it was not documented.
5. Keep reading some pages from the book of Reich>
6. Ask for a recorder.
7. Transport info to the body data map.

As always I have in my mind many ideas. So the real task will be to make at least 3 of them.

……………………………………………..

http://www.culturebot.org/2012/05/13561/what-performance-art-can-learn-contemporary-performance-practices/

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-13167360

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The eye’s condition disturbs. I didn’t really worked today.

29.09 2013

Room 116.  P.A.F.                        

22.00

First presentation in front of my peers and the two tutors in order to get feedback.

The presentation was made at 22.10 in the small room 116. I was walking around till to find the “right space” then I understood that it was not about the form, it’s not the moment to concern about the way and the form or format which will present my work..It s about the content and how to go deeper…and it’s something to remember constantly.Anyway I choose the empty room next to mine. It was more intimate space and compact space. When they came inside the could accommodate their selves to bed or stand on their feet. The first thing they did was to give  a look to the body data map on the wall.

The I started reading the underlined words of my first text>

“Who Fenia is 32 58 brown hair long very thin male energy that someone attacks her feels sorry make money makes me uncomfortable real chaos the worst jump without warning when I speak I have the fear others won’t listen at me power is coming out honey small chin although when I look at them in the mirror I fin them attractive impressing the others find excuses cries easily to deal with rejection afraid is egoist dance is sleeping inside bottles empty bottles 100o foto in facebook lose herself analyse her past exaggerate Fenia would like to learn how to climb as a boy to the tree smiles Fotini new name is octopus thinks  with glasses and a pipe  each plokami holds a different object a book a feather a broken glass a letter a flower an other smaller octopus a root a chocolate a photo a thread and scissors sits on clepsidra  

Then I went more in to specific by showing the video with Fenia’s poses

P for Poses from Foteini K on Vimeo.

and the 1 minute video with  the  naked dance in the space >”Fenia tries not being beautiful while she is dancing”.

Follows the next unedited video where I speak about the “thing” while I am in front of the mirror making a beard using some of my hair. When the text finishes I close the light of the mirror.

Feedback

Pavlos experiences the presentation as a tour guide in a museum where something unimportant was coming and presenting as something very important. Like a village that has museums to present the more important things you can find in it. What is important and what is not? In case that takes this direction it has to be well made in order to “convince” the viewer for the big importance of the exposed object/subject. I like this idea that comes out.

Then he made the association with the creation of the new institute of Marina Abramovic. He asked me to what position I take about this event. To look the adv of Abramovic with lady Gaga. Museum as a place of ego-centrism.

http://www.marinaabramovicinstitute.org/

Naked dance> not at all a dance where I don’t try to be beautiful> a combination of a juicy  Isadora Duncan, contemporary dancing techniques, reminding of  Lady Gaga and Abramovic running naked for MAI adv.  Do you make fun of yourself? And why to try not being beautiful?

In fact the whole frame and the way I move to the space cannot be considered as ugly. This video is more> Fenia being beautiful while dancing.I am wondering how much really ugly can I be and why this would be necessary to discover. Where is placed and how ugliness is presented  in relation to identity? What means to be ugly?It has only aesthetic criteria?Already I follow a kind of aesthetics that characterizes me. Do I need to consider it? to change it?

Mythic- Big rather than Mythological. In my idea to depict or use the symbolic image of octopus coming out from the automatic writing, Pavlos question is how much necessary is to make something mythological. the whole thing is already surrealistic and is more mythic than mythological. How much needs the audience to see something that is not realistic?

Hiding> Why do you hide the foto? Why there is no here the figure of the  Father?Why and what is censored?

On the body data map there where 3 foto (grandfather, brother, mother). These foto were turned in the opposite side so u could see their faces. On the white side was written only who is in the foto. Vagia noticed that also in the unedited video I start by saying that I hide the thing  about which I speak. This brings to my mind the discussion we had with Pavlos about the censorship. If I decide to write a dictionary for example what do I include and what I don’t? what do I censor and why?

So this it will be very important to reflect on> What do I hide, from whom and if not to whom is accessible the hidden information? I like the idea to have a “secret” space where the most awkward/strange/unspoken things are accessible to some people? who is going to have access?how the audience discover them?

JAN asked me what do I want to do with this two characters (male and female). When and where do they meet each other? What happens with them?

An epic movie?

A video where these two parts are discussing about something. A conversation. An encounter where they taking to each other. A scenario of seduction/making love or whatever the fantasy recalls.

Use Fantasy.

Vagia> I liked the fact that you started with one identity and you finished with an other one.. not only physically, aesthetically but also as behavior, body language, expression. This it could be interesting as another way to present the work..slowly slowly to change to be transformed almost in a imperceptible way.

 Also I didn’t understand about what you were speaking in the video> what kind of thing is?

This is a “thing” that can be one of the “secrets”. I don’t reveal it yet.

A question that u can put in relation to the video where u dance trying to be ugly is “why u  think that this is ugly?”.

Vagia shows me a video where she thinks to be ugly. It is ugly because she founds it “sick”. On the other hand I found it interesting and not for sure ugly. So which are are the criteria to define something as ugly? and especially regarding the MOVEMENT.

……………………………..

Many things to consider and to reflect before or while I am going on. Next step> go out of the room and take a walk outside in the countryside.

Thursday 29.09.2013 PAF

Today, I wake up in better mood. Time for practice. 

The task is to make 24 video samples about basic characteristics/concepts regarding Fenia in order to define more precisely her identity. Who is, what she is doing, how she is doing it, why she is doing it.  The task is to take this empty space and convert it in the most interesting encyclopedia ever existed!

 Some info I found on web about encyclopedia is that>

Encyclopedia: always a work in progress.

• list of entries/topics
• index
• cross references
• definitions
• examples
• illustrations
• maps
• biography
• statistics
• dictionary> linguistic information.
• the myth

It s a type of reference work-a compendium holding a summary of information. It focus on factual information to cover the thing or concept for which the article name stands. It collects knowledge disseminated around the globe.

“Encyclo”: enkyklios> circular, recurrent, general.

“Paedia”: education, rearing of child.

Let’s make an example

FIRST EXAMPLE:

POSE 

 Free dictionary:

1. To assume or hold a particular position or posture, as in sitting for a portrait.

2. To affect a particular mental attitude.

3. To represent oneself falsely; pretend to be other than what one is.

or

1. A bodily attitude or position, especially one assumed for an artist or a photographer.

2. A studied attitude assumed for effect

Follows a VIDEO with the main poses of Fenia when she is in front of someone she likes. 

I am aware the last years how I change my body language in front of someone that I like. Even if I can feel this change I don’t stop it. So it was not so much difficult  to represent or simulate this action without to be in a real context.

I choosed one of the spaces in PAF and I realized afterwords (and especially with Pavlos feedback and observations)that this choice, made because of my preference and not because of its functionality, was suitable for a “romantic situation” (because fenia is romantic). 

In the afternoon I had a meeting with Jan..at the end of the discussion Jan told me that he didn’t understand anything. So it was time to so something. Okay it’s time to let my fucking complicating and overwhelmed brain and DO something that after I will expose.

One of the main difficulties I have is the conditions of the medium I use. The PC is getting slower and slower and in some points crashes. In this lies the risk in one moment to lose everything and not be able to use technology or to spend more time to do something (like editing, elaborating foto material, researching online, writing in blog). So I am depended on technology. What I want to create has a virtual character. Is the virtual “fake”? How much “real” is what I present?

 

P for Poses from Foteini K on Vimeo.

Wednesday 28.08.2013 PAF

The plan for today was to collect material about myself. At the end of the day, I have a body map with my outline hanged on the wall, a text from 1hour automatic writing about myself (4 pages A4), 1 text about my feelings regarding a “secret” object, 55 Foto of my body and its different parts. After the work of today the ideas become more clear but at the same time I realize that indeed this project is about Me; therefore I start feeling a bit uncomfortable. From this non- comfortable space and the conscious  self-obsessive occupation to collecting material about myself,  it will come out the real answer on why I am doing  a project like that and why it could be interesting for someone to watch. I start understanding that is not so easy and simple work to do.

• How much distance do I take from myself in order to discover, explore, document myself? This first text is written sometimes in the 3rd person and sometimes in the 1st person.
• What Fenia is?What Fenia represents? Is Fenia, Fotini? Fotini and Fenia are the same person? (Fotini is my real name, that my family and friends from childhood and school times use to call me. Fenia is a name that my first dance teacher gave to me and that stays the way to present my self in the field of art. How much the name defines yourself?Why an artist choose a different name to present and sign for his/her work?
• Is it artistic process or an other kind of psychoanalysis?
• Where is my alter ego, Leo?which is his role?

Idea: Making an encyclopedia of Fenia by creating an interactive space -an interactive  ENCYCLOPEDIA where all the information/references/maps/dictionary/history about Fenia are exposed.

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Link: Woody Allen. movie. Self presentation.